"Today we mourn the passing of a beloved old friend, Common Sense.

He will be remembered as having cultivated such valuable lessons as: Knowing when to come in out of the rain; why the early bird gets the worm; Life isn't always fair; maybe it was my fault. Common Sense lived by simple sound financial policies: Don't spend more than you can earn. And reliable strategies: Adults, not children, are in charge.

His health began to deteriorate when parents attacked teachers for doing the job that they themselves had failed to do in disciplining their unruly children. It declined even further when it became punishable for you to defend yourself from a burglar in your own home but the burglar could sue you for assault. Common Sense gave up the will to live after a woman failed to realize that a steaming cup of coffee was hot.

Common Sense was preceded in death by his parents, Truth and Trust; his wife, Discretion; his Daughter, Responsibility; and his son, Reason. He is survived by his three stepbrothers; I Know My Rights, Someone Else Is To blame, and I'm A Victim.

Not many attended his funeral because so few realized he was gone. If you still remember him, pass this on. If not, join the majority and do nothing."